Just Show Up

As deshis, one of our responsibilities is to train with beginners who join the dojo. We train regularly in the beginner classes. If any student needs extra practice outside class, we make ourselves available to train with them, and to help them get ready for their upcoming tests.

It seems that for every student who reaches shodan (black belt), thousands of students sign up to take Aikido classes. Beginners join all the time, and there's no way of knowing who's going to stick with the training. it. Some are in good shape already; others are overweight and out of shape. Some are athletic and have done dance or gymnastics - some even have a black belt in another martial art; others have led primarily sedentary lives.

It also seems that there's no way of knowing who's going to be good at Aikido. Some new students are very coordinated and pick up the basic moves in no time. Others are awkward, inflexible, and struggle with every move and step. But there's one easy way to get good at Aikido - show up for class. No matter how talented a student appears to be when they first join the class, or how quickly they might pick things up when moves are demonstrated to them,, the only way a student will get good at Aikido is if they train regularly.

Unfortunately, it's just a fact that after a while, most people stop coming to class. There are a lot of reasons why students don't continue. I know them (because I've used them myself): I hurt, I'm tired, there are other things to do, I want a drink, I'm lazy, I'm not in the mood. I also know first-hand how tempting it can be to not go to class - especially when you're sore from falling hard on an unforgiving mat.

For some reason, newcomers think that falling on the mat isn't going to hurt. The first time they take a fall they get a shock. Our mat is not very giving, and if you don't fall right, it definitely hurts. It isn't long before the beginners are sore and bruised. I tell them to pay special attention to their falls and rolls - "Go slowly and learn how to fall right, because if you don't, it's going to hurt, and it won't be any fun." I know, because 2 weeks after I moved into the dojo, I was black and blue, and could barely move.

When I first started taking classes, it felt like my body had corners when I rolled. Each time I rolled, every one of those corners got bashed. Before too long, however, I gradually learned to round out those corners - or maybe they just get worn down by crashing into the floor over and over. Eventually though, with practice, the rolls became a little easier. All of a sudden, one day, I realized, "this is fun!" The next thing I knew, I was flowing easily around the mat. That wasn't always the case, however.

Donny signed up a few months ago. Donny was a young man in his early 20s and in very good shape. When I signed him up I explained that if he didn't like aikido, it, he could get his money back. During the class, I showed him how to do a forward roll. After a few days Donny came back and said he wasn't going to continue. "It's the rolls." He said. "They make me dizzy." I tried to tell him that it would get better. "It happens to everyone." I told him. "You'll be fine. It just takes a little practice." He wouldn't be convinced. "It ruins my whole day." Said Donny. I gave him back his money.

People often comment on how graceful Aikidoists appear as they fly through the air. It's doubly frustrating to watch the advanced students flow gracefully around the mat, and then, when it's your turn, and you are stepping onto the mat for the first time, you can't figure out how to step in tenkan and irimi (the 2 most basic steps used in Aikido).

When I started, I felt awkward and clumsy, and was frustrated as I tried to do what seemed to be the simplest things, while everyone else appeared to be floated effortlessly around the mat. It's not unusual for a student to feel that they're just not cut out for Aikido.

Betty signed up a few months ago. Betty was a middle-aged lady (younger than me) who wanted to learn Aikido. Betty broke down in tears on her first day, and had to be coaxed back out of the women's dressing room to give it another try. I told her that everyone has the same experience, and that I could guarantee that she would improve quickly, but she stopped coming after only a few more visits.

I try to reassure the beginners that all the things they're doing - being too stiff, trying to muscle their way through techniques, getting confused about which foot to move - are normal, and that everyone has the same challenges. "Really?" They say, surprised to hear that others experience the same problems. I don't think they always believe me, but the fact is, that I understand exactly how they feel, because I was worse than most.

When I started, I had a shodan in Kenpo, that I had earned many years ago. Before that, when I was a teenager, I did Shotokan (a hard Okinawan style of Karate). But my experience in martial arts didn't help me at all when I started doing Aikido. If anything, my previous experience got in my way. My stances were much too wide. I was much too stiff.

"Relax!!" Dean used to shout at me. "I'm trying." I said. Relax more!" He said. I tried to use my upper body strength. "Relax your shoulders! Use your hips!" Dean said. I could never remember whether to move my right foot or my left, and usually decided to move the wrong one. My ukemi (the art of falling) was terrible - I was stiff, and I didn't blend at all with the nage (the person performing the technique). The only thing I had going for me was a little insight into my own character. "I'm not very smart, and I don't pick things up easily." I thought to myself, "But, if I just show up everyday, maybe, eventually, it will rub off on me."

Now, I join the beginners class each evening to help out. I try to pair up with the newest students to help them. Every week a new beginner joins class. It's not always easy to stay enthusiastic - especially when I know that most of the beginners aren't going to stick around - but I've learned to stay positive and remind myself that each student could be the one who will stay for years, excel, and become a devoted and accomplished Aikidoist. In any case, I enjoy helping them, and it gives me a chance to work on my own Aikido. I learned my lesson the hard way, however.

Once, in weapons class, I was paired with an older beginner who, although he has been at the dojo a long time, hasn't made much improvement. He often seems confused and just can't follow directions. I was just going through the motions, while waiting patiently for him to move. Sensei saw me and corrected me.

"You shouldn't walk through the form just because he doesn't know what to do." She said. "You should always do your best and practice with intention." After that, no matter who I was training with, I tried to do my best - even if it was in very slow motion. If I did it slowly, it just gave me that much more time to concentrate on my form. I also learned not to baby the beginners too much.

When training with new people in the beginners class, I was always careful not to throw them very hard, knowing that they were still learning their basic falls and rolls. Ace, an instructor, watched me. "You're being very nice." He said. He continued. "You're being too nice." He elaborated. "You're being EXCESSIVELY nice. The new students have to feel what Aikido is about, and if you don't take their balance and throw them, they won't feel what's going on." After that, I tried to make sure that I actually did the techniques, while still making sure that the beginners didn't fall too hard.

A couple of days ago, Ryan came to class. He hasn't been in class as much since he took his nidan (2d degree black belt) a month ago. "I kind of felt like I needed to take a break since my test." He said. "Do you ever have trouble staying motivated?" I thought for a moment. "Yeah." I said. "Sometimes I don't feel like going to class." "So what do you do?" Asked Ryan. "I just show up." I said.

I may not always feel like going to class, but once it starts, I have fun. Showing up is the hard part. That's why I decided to become an uchi deshi. I'm lazy, and I know I'm lazy. I knew that when I was done with work I wouldn't want to go to class. Once I got home it would be so much easier to put my feet up, watch tv, and have a beer.

Now, however, as a deshi, when I get off work and go to my room at the dojo, I have to walk right by the mat. No matter how much I don't want to train, I remind myself that it's only 1 hour or so. It's not that much. Once class is over, (after I'm through jumping rope) I can put my feet up, watch a movie, and drink my beer.